"In every district we are gaining ground."
"I have watched your progress with joyful pride," answered the chairman,
as he smiled in hellish glee. "But I noted the sharp conflicts you had
with certain reformers in the churches."
"Some of them we cannot conquer," despairingly admitted the leader.
"Grieve not over forts you cannot take, but make good use of those
that have surrendered."
"They are firing our guns splendidly," quickly intercepted the leader,
as he rose and read the following report:
1. "We have labored earnestly in the ranks of the church until many
more of her members now believe that the moral effect of our Theatres
is helpful.
2. "We have succeeded in dividing the members of many churches on this
question, and have witnessed, with pleasure, the many kinds of quarrels
that have resulted therefrom.
3. "We have succeeded in turning the tide of many periodicals, so that
the defense of the Theatre, as a moral stimulant, is more general than
ever."
As the leader closed his brief report, the chairman offered his
compliments, and the host cheered with vigor.
The committee retired. The chairman again lifted his hand and two
clangs were heard. This was the signal for the appearance of the
"Park-Theatre" committee.
"Good tidings, or ill?" tersely asked the chairman.
"Good tidings of the first degree," cheerily replied the leader of the
committee as he proceeded to read his document:
1. "We labored, with all zeal, to carry out the schemes concocted
previously.
2. "We have succeeded in locating a series of free Theatres at every
summer park where we could possibly induce the management to admit
them.
3. "These Theatres, even though they be of a third or fourth class,
are doing a great service for us by implanting a taste for other grades.
4. "By this happy medium we are winning young people and church-members
by the thousand, for they can attend these Park exhibitions without
being severely criticised.
5. "We are careful to give them enough immoral and sensual bait to
draw them further. (Wild applause.)
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